Why “Falling Off” Is a Myth—and What’s Really Happening Instead

I can’t count how many times I’ve heard someone whisper—almost like a confession—“I fell off the wagon.”

Usually, it’s after a weekend of pizza and birthday cake or a week when the gym shoes stayed buried under laundry. I get it. I used to say the same thing.

But here’s the truth I wish someone had told me years ago: there is no wagon.
You can’t “fall off” something that was never real in the first place.

The Myth of the Perfect Plan

That imaginary wagon comes straight from diet culture. We’re sold the idea that a healthy life is a neat checklist—meal prep every Sunday, five workouts a week, zero sugar. Miss a box? You failed.

But health isn’t a checklist. It’s a living, breathing thing.

Some weeks you sleep like a rock and cook every meal. Other weeks you’re up late with a sick kid and dinner is scrambled eggs at 9 p.m. That’s not failure—that’s real life.

When I worked night shifts as a nurse, I’d “start over Monday” every single week. I thought discipline meant punishing myself for being human. All it did was keep me stuck in an all-or-nothing cycle: perfect or worthless.

What’s Actually Happening When You Think You’ve “Fallen Off”

If there’s no wagon, what’s really going on when you feel like you’ve lost control?
Usually, it’s one of three things:

1. Your plan isn’t built for real life.
   A meal plan that requires two hours of chopping every night will crumble the minute your schedule changes. That’s not you failing—it’s the plan.

2. Your stress is calling the shots.
   Cortisol (the stress hormone) drives late-night cravings. Your body is smart, not weak.
   This is where tracking your glucose can be a game-changer.
   Nutrisense Continuous Glucose Monitor shows, in real time, how stress, sleep, and even that late-night snack affect your blood sugar—so you can see what’s happening instead of guessing.

3. Old stories are running the show.
   Maybe you were praised as a kid for cleaning your plate or told dessert was a “treat” for being good. Those patterns show up when you’re tired or sad, even decades later.

Recognizing these patterns is the first step to building emotional resilience and breaking the diet cycle.

Real-Life Example: The Vacation Spiral

Last summer we took a family trip to Colorado. I packed trail mix and big plans for morning hikes. By day three we were eating cinnamon rolls the size of my head and sleeping in.

Old me would’ve said, “Welp, blew it. Back to square one Monday.”

Instead, I asked myself: What do I actually need right now?

Turns out it was water, a slow walk, and a break from tracking anything. When we got home, I didn’t need a reset. I just kept going.

That’s the secret—there’s no “back on.” There’s only the next choice.

Building Emotional Resilience

The hardest part isn’t nutrition science. It’s mindset.

Here are a few things that help me—and my clients—ditch the wagon mentality:

• Name the narrative.
  Catch yourself saying, “I ruined everything.” Pause. Ask, “Is that true—or just a story I’ve been told?”

• Zoom out.
  Look at habits over a month, not a day. One missed workout means nothing in a sea of movement.

• Have a “bare minimum” plan.
  My personal baseline: drink water, eat a protein at each meal, take a 10-minute walk. If that’s all I manage during chaos, I’m still caring for myself.

• Feel the feeling, skip the shame.
  Guilt doesn’t burn calories. It only fuels the binge-restrict cycle.

The Science Supports Small, Flexible Steps

Behavior research shows habits form through repetition and environment, not willpower alone.
A Health Psychology study found that people who focused on small, consistent actions—like adding veggies to lunch—were more successful long-term than those chasing perfection.

Translation: You don’t need a detox. You need flexible healthy habits that work when life isn’t Instagram-ready.

Tiny Shifts That Stick

Here are a few practical tweaks for sustainable weight loss and everyday resilience:

• Flexible meal prep. Batch-cook chicken or lentils, but don’t lock yourself into a set menu.

• Snack rule. If hungry between meals, pair protein with produce—apple + cheese, almonds + grapes.

• Movement menu. Instead of “I must run,” keep a list: 10-min walk, dance party with kids, quick strength circuit. Pick what fits that day.

These aren’t glamorous, but they work when the week gets messy.

A Pep Talk for Your Next “Slip”

Next time you think you’ve fallen off, try this:
Take one slow breath. Ask, What’s the next small thing I can do for my body? Maybe it’s a glass of water, maybe it’s turning off the TV and heading to bed.

That’s it.
Not dramatic. Not shiny. Just the next step.

Because health isn’t a finish line. It’s a relationship—one where you get to stay, even when it’s complicated.

Let’s Walk This Out Together

If this idea of “no wagon” feels freeing but a little scary, you don’t have to figure it out alone.
I offer free 60-minute consultations to help you map out habits that fit your life.

Curious what’s secretly sabotaging your healthy habits?
Take my What’s Sabotaging Your Healthy Habits? quiz—it’s quick and eye-opening.

Need tools to quiet that inner drill sergeant?
Grab the Inner Critic Playbook.

Want to see how different foods affect your body without the food guilt?
Download the What Spikes Me Workbook and start your own 7-day experiment.

This work is about building trust with yourself, one choice at a time.

You don’t need to wait for Monday. You can start right now.